"You're an ass..."

Day 5 is in the books and Meagan uttered the above phrase and scarily reminded me of my mother.

The day started by my ruining of the Letson's table cloth with maple syrup (sorry Mrs. Letson!) while enjoying a wonderful breakfast prepared by Kayla Letson and it ended with a couple glasses of wine to accompany Liz's fantabulous meal for dinner. I can't help but to appreciate the contributions of those riders who were not able to make the ride this year... Billy Quinn driving us into the BX, Elizabeth making us dinner at Aunt Deb's house...and it makes me smile that this ridiculous adventure has become somewhat of a tradition that is difficult to let go of. But this is neither here nor there; let me tell you a little bit about today.

I have to warn you though...This is a little bit uncouth, if you will.

Today was a pretty flat ride. We rode on "rail trails" a good portion of the day and therefore did not have to deal with too many hills. The hills that we did deal with though caused my chain to fall off several times. The longer I continue to ride the more I realize what a piece of crap this Dasani bike that I am on is, and the more determined I become to finish the ride on it. My only concern is the squeaking sound it is perpetually making...It sounds like an old swing set, not a trustworthy bike. Despite the flatness of the terrain, my ride was slightly uncomfortable (and here comes the uncouth part..Meagan [and Mom] stop reading now, continue at the asterisk). For one thing, I think all of the unhealthy meals I've been eating (Please see yesterday's entry for some insight) finally caught up with me because I was dealing with some pretty ridiculous gas pains all day. And these weren't ordinary gas pain...These were some serious, "I didn't think I ate chili last night, but oh right I ate a deep fried twinkie for lunch" gas pains. I just couldn't shake them. I'm sure the grilled cheese with tomato and bacon, french fries and 3 pickles didn't help. But as John likes to say, "You gotta fuel the machine." Additionally, I'm also battling some awful chafing as well. I occasionally readjust my position on the bike but there's only so much I can do. I just gotta deal with the discomfort for the next few days.

*On a positive note, and to continue a tradition, we played "I'm going on a Picnic" twice today. Here's how they went (to the best of my (and Meagan's memory)

A: Apples/Antipasto Salad
B: Biscotti/Bubble Gum
C: Candy Corn/Cranberry Sauce
D: Dasani/Daffodils
E: Eclairs/Eggplant Rollatini
F: Fishcakes/Fig Newtons
G: Granola Bars/Garden Salad
H: Hash Browns from the Winsted Diner/Hairspray
I: Ice Cream/Iggy Pop
J: John's Lactaid Pills/Jameson
K: Kazoo/Kebobs
L: Lemonade-Iced Tea/LOUD NOISES
M: Mangos/Maker's Mark
N: Nostradamus/Nails
O: Ourang Outangs/Over the Counter Aleve
P: Penguins/Pints of Guiness
Q: Quartz (rocks)/Quistle (Crystal) a person...
R: Rice Krispie Treats/Roast Beef (from Nick's)
S: Schlitz Beer/Soy Roast Beef
T: Tequilla/Tullymore Dew
U: Umbrella/Uruguayan Sea Bass
V: Vinny/Volvo
W: Whale/Willy Wonka...and his Chocolate Factory
X: X-Ray Machine/Xihphoid Process
Y: Yankee's Blanket
Z: Zanni

And there you have it...Awesome right...Enjoy it! Two days left and I need to sleep...

So it goes...